I’m writing my memoirs-does it make me just a character in the book? Hadley Freeman

“I The reviews were judgmental and talked about me as if I weren’t a journalist and the author of best-selling books and award-winning articles. ” The writer said Nancy Joe Sales on Femsplainers Podcast, There was arguably the most obvious interview I met last week. Perhaps the best-known salesman for her work at Vanity Fair is writing a book, Nothing personal about online dating culture, Following her documentary, Swipe,and 2015 vanity fair features In the subject. Sales concludes in all her views on this issue that these apps are bad for women, at least in part based on her own experience. Many of them are bad for women. The man doesn’t know you or cares about you, “she said in an interview.

I completely own that I haven’t read a sales book yet. But judging from what she said, I collect that it focuses on her online dating experience, and she didn’t particularly like the critics’ view of it.The reviews she described as “judgmental” New York Times, And her Femsplainers interview didn’t get much better. Interviewer Daniel Crittenden said he was looking for a “companionship” because Sales, 56, was so disappointed with the app, but he was looking for a man in his twenties on his dating profile. He said it was because he said he was. Then invite them for casual sex.

“I’m judged by you and I feel ashamed of you as a slut,” Sales said, ending the interview.

That same day Sinéad O’Connor was BBC Radio 4 Women’s Time Discuss her memoirs, memoriesRefers to her mental health issues. Host Emma Burnett said critics once described O’Connor as “a crazy woman in the pop attic.” O’Connor dismissed the explanation in a funny way, but then she said in an interviewAggressive and misleading, Quoting that quote.

This reminded me Flore in 2017, The writer Roxane Gay Was promoting her book Hunger: Memoirs of (my) body.. In this book, Gay “sizes” the negotiations she must make with the world, including once struggling to get on stage for an event “while hundreds of people are staring awkwardly.” “Women”. Gay spoke to Australian podcast Mama Mia. When the podcast went online, it was accompanied by this explanation in the book, which attempted to clumsyly imitate gay tone. Will she fit in the office elevator? How many steps does she have to take to get to the interview? None of this is disclosed in a mean spirit. That’s part of what Roxane writes in Hunger. Gay described this as “cruel and humiliating,” and the website apologized.

Nowadays, nothing is more valuable than someone’s personal experience. I wrote about journalism trends more than a decade ago by (often female) journalists. Cannibalize your life for a copy, And this flowed into publication.Mere fiction writers struggle to compete with books based on their experience of dating, for example (Dolly Alderton’s). Everything I know about love), Or motherhood (Eliane Glaser’s) Motherhood: Manifest). Personal experience is considered the last word. “This is my truth” is a modern mantra.

But when you write about your personal experience, it becomes a public property, and the public-and the press-will have their own truth about your truth. This seems to have surprised many writers. They can talk about their experience, but they don’t think they can challenge it. Ideally, the reader feels sensitive, but not always. When you hear how you describe yourself, what once felt like confession or self-deprecation feels more insulting. Your own life is reconstructed by others, but it is no one’s job to support the interpretation of their experience by the writer, other than their spokesperson.

Since then My book about my family It came out last year and a stranger shared my thoughts on my relatives. Someone recently emailed me that it was wrong to say that my proud Zionist, my great uncle Alex, was fed up with Israeli politics today. My first reaction was, “Well, did you know Alex here, your companion, or me?” But I turned Alex into a character in the book, so of course the reader will have his own story about him.

And soon they will have their own thoughts about me, as I am writing now, yes, Memoirs, This time about my teenager at various psychiatric facilities. Maybe they will admire my illustrious victory, or maybe they will ridicule me as an overly spoiled narcissist. It’s the risk you take when you monetize your life. The author of the memoir must follow this maxim. It’s better to question people’s interpretation of your life than no one talks about it.

I’m writing my memoirs-does it make me just a character in the book? Hadley Freeman

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