It took me a long time, but I finally love being gay | Eleanor Margolis
I The other night, when I woke up and lay down thinking about death, I realized something big. Tapeworms, dung beetles, writers (again), of all the things I could be reborn with, my biggest fear is straightening back. I can honestly say that this thought sends shivers down my spine. Because while it’s not disrespectful to my heterosexual friends, I don’t know how they go about their day. Especially straight women. I don’t understand how they go about their lives dealing with all the power dynamics in a heterosexual relationship without even having the option of dating other women. I don’t think I can hack it and I have the utmost respect for them.
But it’s not just the romantic side of things. Over the years, being gay has changed my whole worldview. It made me rethink all social norms, from nuclear families to uncomfortable shoes. And I’m not saying all heterosexuals lack the imagination to venture into these things, but being gay really helps. Recently, I realized that I have full rights to buy clothes in the men’s section. It was a revelation in itself. Again, I know straight women who do this. But when it comes to wearing “men’s” clothes really easily and confidently, being a lesbian is just that. I will help.
In the end, as I lay in bed, I realized that I was in love with being gay. And this took a long, long time. Much like learning how blue cheese tastes, slow baked. But I’ve always found that the preferences you have to acquire are the ones you cling to and defend the most.
Thirteen years ago, when I was 21, I hated being gay.me too wrote an article About the isolation and frustration I felt after publishing the same publication. I wrote it from a place of hurt, so I regret writing it. I was fresh out of college, and despite living in Brighton for three years, I had very few queer friends. My first relationship with a woman lasted several months, it was one of the best fun I’ve ever had, but the results were the worst. I took my grief and anger out on my sexuality. I decided to “pass” as heterosexual and had no choice but to wear my first pair of many DMs with a floral tee and her dress (thanks, 2010). Mentally, I couldn’t write about being gay. Anyway, I won’t make it public.
Recently, however, I received an email from someone saying that they resonated with the article. She told me it was still hard for her to be gay. mid-culture war. In the midst of a moral panic, we are being accused of “grooming” children, just like in the good old days of Article 28, gays are still suffering and it’s amazing It doesn’t matter.But don’t hate those you hate, hate yourself we For no good reason, it’s a tragedy.
The sender asked me how I made a living out of being gay, and I said it was because of people. In my early twenties, I moved back to London, where I discovered the lesbian scene. It was the golden age of Dalston, East London, and I used to go to clubs with names like ‘Twat Boutique’ at night. I have made many new queer friends, and each one has made me a happy gay woman. Their trust became mine. Every woman I dated (including the one who dumped me), every gender bender I danced badly with, and comforted me in the bathroom line when I was sad about the woman who dumped me. To all the gorgeous elders who gave me a thank you from the bottom of my gay little heart. While this may sound like a “good to wear a tuxedo” Oscar acceptance speech, I also want to thank the beautiful woman I’m engaged to for good reason.
I forgive the young lady who wrote the original article, and I hope you do too. That is, someone who may have been disturbed or affected by the writings of someone who is very distressed. I wish she could put her arm around her and tell her how happy she would be.
Summarize this content to 100 words I The other night, when I woke up and lay down thinking about death, I realized something big. Tapeworms, dung beetles, writers (again), of all the things I could be reborn with, my biggest fear is straightening back. I can honestly say that this thought sends shivers down my spine. Because while it’s not disrespectful to my heterosexual friends, I don’t know how they go about their day. Especially straight women. I don’t understand how they go about their lives dealing with all the power dynamics in a heterosexual relationship without even having the option of dating other women. I don’t think I can hack it and I have the utmost respect for them.But it’s not just the romantic side of things. Over the years, being gay has changed my whole worldview. It made me rethink all social norms, from nuclear families to uncomfortable shoes. And I’m not saying all heterosexuals lack the imagination to venture into these things, but being gay really helps. Recently, I realized that I have full rights to buy clothes in the men’s section. It was a revelation in itself. Again, I know straight women who do this. But when it comes to wearing “men’s” clothes really easily and confidently, being a lesbian is just that. I will help.In the end, as I lay in bed, I realized that I was in love with being gay. And this took a long, long time. Much like learning how blue cheese tastes, slow baked. But I’ve always found that the preferences you have to acquire are the ones you cling to and defend the most.Thirteen years ago, when I was 21, I hated being gay.me too wrote an article About the isolation and frustration I felt after publishing the same publication. I wrote it from a place of hurt, so I regret writing it. I was fresh out of college, and despite living in Brighton for three years, I had very few queer friends. My first relationship with a woman lasted several months, it was one of the best fun I’ve ever had, but the results were the worst. I took my grief and anger out on my sexuality. I decided to “pass” as heterosexual and had no choice but to wear my first pair of many DMs with a floral tee and her dress (thanks, 2010). Mentally, I couldn’t write about being gay. Anyway, I won’t make it public.Recently, however, I received an email from someone saying that they resonated with the article. She told me it was still hard for her to be gay. mid-culture war. In the midst of a moral panic, we are being accused of “grooming” children, just like in the good old days of Article 28, gays are still suffering and it’s amazing It doesn’t matter.But don’t hate those you hate, hate yourself we For no good reason, it’s a tragedy.The sender asked me how I made a living out of being gay, and I said it was because of people. In my early twenties, I moved back to London, where I discovered the lesbian scene. It was the golden age of Dalston, East London, and I used to go to clubs with names like ‘Twat Boutique’ at night. I have made many new queer friends, and each one has made me a happy gay woman. Their trust became mine. Every woman I dated (including the one who dumped me), every gender bender I danced badly with, and comforted me in the bathroom line when I was sad about the woman who dumped me. To all the gorgeous elders who gave me a thank you from the bottom of my gay little heart. While this may sound like a “good to wear a tuxedo” Oscar acceptance speech, I also want to thank the beautiful woman I’m engaged to for good reason.I forgive the young lady who wrote the original article, and I hope you do too. That is, someone who may have been disturbed or affected by the writings of someone who is very distressed. I wish she could put her arm around her and tell her how happy she would be.
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2023/jun/10/fall-in-love-gay-happiness-queer-friends It took me a long time, but I finally love being gay | Eleanor Margolis